Dear enthusiast readers!
Three weeks has passed since I started traveling from Finland. First, I would like you to have some idea, for what is this trip for.
Imagine a little child who tries to be a big man. How is he like?
Perhaps he is self-sufficient, independent on how others think about him.
Perhaps he is successful with his career, follows his intuition, is conscious of his inner emotions and thoughts but is not controlled by them.
Maybe this man always knows what he wants, is assertive and strong during moments of despair and uncertainty.
For me, this man really seems ideal of a SUPERIOR MAN. It resonates with my ideals of myself.
That is what I`m trying to find out in myself. I am that little boy, I step into the big world and try to push the superior man, my dream, out of myself.
This adventure, how I call it, is especially about dealing with and confronting the little child that lives inside this grown-up body. And I want to learn to do it RIGHT, following my own truth. It is starting to take a form…
Insights what I`ve had so far are:
– My presence often consists of this little inner child.
– This little child never leaves me, and it shouldn`t.
– A lot of the mindset of this little child is formed by childhood experiences.
– This little child wants to be accepted, in order to grow and develop. And who actually accepts him? MYSELF!
I have secure, loving and familiar circumstances at my home environment. I have a family that cares about me, friends with whom I share many of my interests and feel connected and especially a loving partner that I love a lot. Most of the time I truly feel accepted, but in some cases I can`t even accept myself. Therefore my inner little child can`t grow. My intention on this trip is to accept this inner little child (myself) and the external world like it is.
Adventure towards that superior man has started!
VOYAGE THROUGH EUROPE
Me and my partner Sonja had a trip filled with unforgettable moments, starting from Tallinn where we first arrived. We were walking towards our friend who let us accommodate in her home. Unexpectedly Sonja shouts and falls down. She had twisted her ankle. Her knee also bleeded. She can`t carry her heavy backbag. A single bypassing thought was: How can this happen on the first day of our trip?
Immediately when that happened, a Columbian man appears and asks to help us.
Amazingly friendly man, he decided to carry Sonja`s baggage into our friends home. We took care of Sonja`s wounds and had a dinner together. Everything ended up really great. Appear of this Columbian man seemed like a miracle, like a guardian angel who comes when there`s a need and despair.
Next day we took a bus towards Berlin, via Riga and Vilnius. We had a friend accommodating us for the first night. However he doesn`t answer to our phone calls. Meanwhile we were thinking what to do, we sat in a cozy restaurant till we got a place to stay, in a house project (5-floor block of flats), where Sonja`s friend is living.
After few days of Berlin, consisting of New Years eve, we were in front of a hitch-hiking -challenge, Berlin-Amsterdam!
Starting from a petrol station at the outskirts of Berlin, we got a first lift from a
German couple who drove us 350 km further, to another petrol station. It was already getting dark, starting to drizzle. A car with Netherlands -register plate stopped at the
station. I went to ask where it was going. It was a family with a young child. The car was already quite full, despite our equipment! Anyway, the man decided to create a solution. With Tetris skills, we could get in the car with our stuff. They drove us straight to Amsterdam! The man just said it`s normal to help people in that way. ”Incredible!” and ”Wow!” were the initial thoughts. The travel of 700km took us 7,5 hours.
In Amsterdam, we stayed at a friends apartment. Getting familiar with lovely people and cozy pubs, it was the time to shift towards warmer and sunnier lands, to Barcelona. Bus travel of 24 hours, we had a brief stop in Paris.
Barcelona`s warmth was certainly something that could only be in our dreams. Swimming at the sea, skateboarding, resting in a park, sucking the radiation from sunshine.
The moment of going for different paths, were soon about to happen. It grew inside us. The moment of letting go of a travel together and leaving secure and loving bubble behind that had constructed around me and my partner. That moment when it actually happens, is hard to confront fully in the moment. Although saying ”safe travels” just temporarily, some part of us feels it permanent. Without complete trust within, such situations would be extremely hard to handle. Trust will be present with me, wherever I go.
Only when I took the bus away from Barcelona to Madrid and started to realize fully the new situation I was in, strong emotions started to burst out of me. They are worth a new blog text. Feelings of letting go and sort of abandonment are common with human beings. The child inside me cries, and I let it cry. It has the right!
Nevertheless, I wasn`t alone. I had an accommodation in Madrid and by coincidence, I met people there, with whom I felt connection. I have this feeling quite often that I`m not alone. There`s something that takes care of me. In that I trust.
ENTERING TO UNKNOWN WORLD
Flight from Madrid to Lima, Peru left the next day. Feeling of being alone wasn`t only physical, it was more to do with language. In Peru they speak Spanish. I will encounter this challenge and learn this language. It is hard in the start, that I must admit.
Overall, Lima is not that different. It`s a city like others. There is constant fog at the sky, because of traffic fumes. You can smell it in the air. There lives around 10 million people in Lima. Buses work well, but no rail transportation network.
People are really welcoming, that is extremely relevant to me. This is a latino culture. People are hospital and warm-hearted. They look me into the eyes and smile. I`m starting to find my inner latino as well. It is really welcome.
My host and friend, his name is Nino. We get along really well. He is really wanting me to learn Spanish. I take that as a way of taking care of me, giving tools how to survive
on my own here, and that is what I want. He helps me here amazingly much. I face my incompleteness here a lot, but that I`m glad to receive. I want to be in balance with it. Nino also gives me a sort of therapy that is a lot to do with breathing. I am happy to receive it. Special thanks for him to use his computer for this blog :).
Here I am a gringo, western person with seemingly lots of money. That makes me prepared here. It`s hard, like is the intensive language school. I am pretty tired after the day. It`s now summer at the coast. Weather is dry, temperature is extremely convenient, between 20-25 celcius.
This week, I head for Machu Picchu, ex-capitol of the Inca empire. I shall connect to its energies and feel throughoutly the presence of the three worlds that were at the center of Inca`s worldview and mythology. With my humble steps, I allow myself to enter to presence of Divinity.
The ideal of this man is not perfection. He doesn`t have to be right but he follows his own truth. He can be wrong and is simultaneously perfect and complete.